Long Distance Relationship (LDR)

Long Distance Love Story

I'm always searching the Internet for stories that inspire and remind me that long-distance relationships can and do succeed. I do this so much for myself and also I'm secure in the knowledge that my LDR works and will continue to do so. I do it for those who waver in the decision whether to begin one or stay in one.For me i believe LDR because the most important things are Heart.....

Warm Hands ,Warm Heart

I read a very interesting article last two day, regarding how temperature affects our behavior and our attitude toward others -Hot Cuppa makes you feel good about others.

It started with this intriguing first line:

Our judgement of someone's character can be influenced by something as simple as the temperature of a drink held in our hands.

It went on to describe how people assessed others after holding something warm or holding something cold.

The participants assessed the person as significantly "warmer" if they had previously held the warm cup of coffee rather than the iced cup of coffee.

It went on:

In a second study, participants held heated or frozen therapeutic packs as part of a product evaluation study and then were told they could receive a gift certificate for a friend or a gift for themselves.

Those who held the hot pack were more likely to ask for the gift certificate, while those who held the frozen pack tended to keep the gift for themselves.

"It appears that the effect of physical temperature is not just on how we see others, it affects our own behaviour as well,"

"Physical warmth can make us see others as warmer people, but also cause us to be warmer - more generous and trusting - as well."

So what does all this have to do with long-distance relationships? Well, as we are painfully aware, we don't often get to share a warm embrace with our long-distance love. A great deal of our relationship takes place over the phone where it's impossible to see things like body language and facial expressions. This can sometimes lead to misunderstandings, especially when we may be stressed or tired.

Here's my personal plan, and dare I say recommendation for you to try as well. I'll make sure I have a warm drink in hand whenever there's the slightest chance that MFFR and I will have a stressful conversation. And if a regular conversation takes an unexpected and relationship-endangering turn, I'll make a fast cup of tea in the microwave. That way, I'll be able to give MFFR the benefit of the doubt and I'll be more loving in my words as well.

So why did it take researchers so long to figure out what my grandma used to say to me when I was a kid - "warm hands, warm heart"! MFFR I Love You...

Long Distance Forever?

Sometimes it seems like my long-distance relationship will remain long-distance forever. And sometimes that doesn't seem like such a bad idea. I've been on my own for so long now that I sometimes wonder if MFFR and I can really forge a life together. There are so many sacrifices to be made that it frightens me to even consider stepping off that ledge.

And then I think about how incredible it feels to be in MFFR arms. And how much I love to hear MFFR laugh. And how long I can just gaze into MFFR beautiful eyes. And I realize that somehow, we will have to find a way.

I'm inspired by a woman on my Novel who truly put it all on the line. Like the rest of us, she fell in love with someone geographically undesireable. She bravely and boldy packed up her life and moved to Maxico to be with him. I admire her spirit and hope that when the time is right, I can make the transition with as much gusto as she did.Now and forward,i speak for my self "be strong" and I've believe that MFFR have to be strong too....MFFR!!!! I.L.O.V.E.Y.O.U....You're my Life!!!!!!

I remember when we first began this relationship, I thought my heart would break every time we had to part. I counted the weeks, days, and minutes until our next visit. I truly didn't know how long I could go on feeling that way.Now let me let you know!!!!Mostly,what i've done to you are my first experience for my life.Feel blessed to God because of you MFFR!!!

I'm happy to say, that the separations have become easier to deal with. You might be thinking that it's because our love is fading. Not true! Our love is as strong and deep as ever. I would even say it's stronger than it was in the beginning because of all we have had to face to make this thing work. And that's the same reason that it's gotten easier to tolerate. We know without question that we are there for each other and we have the confidence that we can deal with anything that comes our way. And trust me, there have been BIG hurdles tossed in our path.

We still speak with each other every day and we still appreciate each other. We still treat each other with respect. We still want more for each other than we do for ourselves. These are some of the keys to a successful long-distance relationship (and any relationship, for that matter).

So for those of you who may be just starting out, take heart. I know how much it can ache to be apart. But remember, each passing day brings you closer together and it really does get easier.I love you MFFR.

-Rahmat Hidayat-